Happy Father's Day to My Favorite Almost-Father!

Happy Father's Day, all you fathers out there who read this blog! By my calculations, for fully one third of you guys, today is your very first Father's Day on the father side of the equation!

The, ahem, one reader I'm referring to here just happens to be my younger brother.

Technically, brother, you are in that Kind-of-Dad category, because the baby hasn't actually been born yet. But the due date is so near that I know today's holiday carries new significance for you this year, and I've definitely seen you make a mental shift in the Dad direction. I know you are excited for the big birth day, but I also know there is so much more to come that you haven't even imagined yet. You have all the makings of a great dad. (And next year you will be celebrating for realsies, without questioning your membership status.)

Now while you have all the makings of a great dad, I don't think you have all the STUFF that a great dad needs. So I've been scouring the Internet to find the very best baby products for a brand new dad like you -- an urban, gadget-loving, computer geek, playful, musical, active, smart, eco-friendly, hands-on, fun kind of dad.

I've found some really good stuff that I would love to get for you....but, of course, I can't get all of it. And, to be completely honest, you really don't neeeeeed any of it. But, man, is it cool!

Feast your fatherly eyes on this:

The 2009 Ultimate Mega Cool Baby Product Shopping List for New Dads Like You (Where Price = Not An Issue)

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MAGNO Wooden Radio from Uncrate

This radio and ipod player would be wonderful in the new nursery. It's attractive, fun and functional, and a lovely shade of green. It's perfect for playing beautiful tunes (and all those not-so-beautiful toddler favorites) for your new little musician-to-be.

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DadGear Cargo Jacket Wearable Diaper Bag

This is a cool jacket for you to wear when you're outdoors doing all those cool outdoor things that you do. Outdoors. Coolly. In your jacket.

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Z'fina Man Sling

Slings are great, but many of them are made with the mother in mind and they look adorably flowered and cute...but not very Dad-ish. But for the hands-on father who wants to do some baby-wearing of his own, this Man Sling is a great way to go.

And just think...if you wore The Man Sling over the ManGear Cargo Jacket, you could venture forth into the world with all the necessities and supplies -- even the baby -- and still have both hands free!* (All while looking very manly!)

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Modern Nursery Custom Canvases

This Custom Canvas is a great idea. Simply send in a photo of you and your child, and the image is transformed into a custom printed canvas on the background color of your choice. Preserve your memories and decorate the nursery, all in one shot. (Plus, it's got that high-contrast appeal that all the new babies are into these days.)

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Food Face Dinner Plate from Perpetual Kid

Ahhh, this one! This one might just be my favorite. The Food Face Dinner Plate set is one of the most creative and funny kid items I've ever seen. Actually, I suppose it would probably keep ME entertained longer than the baby...but how fun would it be to serve yet another boring meal on an exciting plate like this?! My only concern is that it's ceramic. While I know that appeals to purists, to old moms like me it just sounds like an accident waiting to happen. But then again...faces to decorate! Clearly Ultimate Mega Cool List -worthy.

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Wheel of Responsibility from Perpetual Kid

I'm guessing that right about now, the thought of taking care of your new little one sounds like a magical thrilling privilege. And you might actually find yourself waking up with glee (or remaining awake most of the night just listening to her breathe and hoping she wakes up again really soon so you can see her some more!!) in the first few weeks, but I promise you, the day will come when you would really rather not feed, diaper, burp, hold, whatever. There will eventually be a time when any one of those things is neither convenient nor fun. So when the newness wears off and all the unicorns have left the building, this little spinner could actually come in handy to help determine who's on duty. (Or at the very least, it could simply remind you to laugh.)

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Extra Nipple Buttons from Perpetual Kid

And speaking of laughing, this one is for the REALLY hands-on dad. The dad who fully supports all efforts on the breast-feeding front and wishes there were more he could do to help. Stick these puppies on and voila! a dual-nursing household it is. (heh, heh)

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USB Desk Vacuum from Whatever Works

As the nursing slowly morphs into First Foods forays, there will likely be times when you are sitting at the keyboard and holding your little whippersnapper while she happily gnaws on her gluten-free crackers and the crumbs will fall all over your computer desk. Have no fear -- your tiny USB Vacuum is here!

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TerraCycle Circuit Board Picture Frame

And speaking of computers....do you know what you will need to add to your desk at work the very second your baby arrives? A picture! These TerraCycle picture frames are made from recycled circuit boards, so they would be perfect for a computer guy's obligatory baby photo display.

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Taga Bike

Zipping around town on your Vespa is one of those great perks about being an Almost-Dad. But once you are an Actual-Literal-Baby-Toting-Dad, you might need to consider an alternative form of transportation. This Taga is one of the coolest bikes I've ever seen! (In fact, I've been gazing at it longingly and kind of wondering if it would still work for a big almost-8-year-old...but I had to admit his head would block my view and his feet would drag along the road. Rats!) But, oh, I can imagine the joys of having this contraption when your baby is a baby!

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Baby Brain iPhone App

Baby Super Tracker iPhone App

And, finally, I came across these two baby care apps. Last I knew, you didn't actually have an iPhone...but I know your devotion to Mac computers (and great technology), so I'm thinking it could just be a matter of time before you have one. And I also know how you like to be prepared and are careful and thorough in all your endeavors. Those characteristics could prove to be really helpful -- and extremely challenging -- when it comes to baby care. So when I saw these iPhone apps in my search for the latest & greatest, I thought the idea was right down your alley and added them to the list. Cool, huh?

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Lots to Say Baby Pacifiers

Much less high-techy, but still with a gadgety theme, are these pacifiers. There's also one (not pictured here) that says "Mute Button" which I was rather tickled by. And one that says "No Hablo." (hee, hee) I suppose they are pretty cheesy -- perhaps even totally tacky -- but they made my Ultimate Mega Cool List nonetheless. Because the thought of giant unblinking baby eyes gazing at me with "Hi" on her lips makes me grin.

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Now, listen. Here's the thing -- I already told you that I can't buy you all of these great products. But, brace yourself! Because I have purchased ONE of the items detailed above to send to you! That's right, one of these lovely gifts will be arriving at your doorstep. Will it be the Taga bike? Or maybe the pacifiers?

I'm not telling. You'll just have to wait and see!** (Isn't this exciting?)

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*You'll have your hands free so you can still do magic tricks! (And just think of all the new places you'll have in which to stash some of those magical components...you'll be the most popular dad at the playground!)

**You should anticipate something more on the pacifier end of the spectrum, though. Just sayin'.

I Will Do One Thing Today. And I Mean It!

Wow -- is it already time for another Semi-Monthly Post of Excuses and Empty Promises? Boy, time sure flies when you're having fun comatose!

I really think things will be different now, because I have something new that is going to free me from the bonds of inaction, give shape to my days, jump-start my ambition, change the very nature of my existence!

Look at this note pad:

Isn't that great?*

I got several packs of those "I Will Do One Thing Today" post-it pads as a birthday present from my mom, and I think they are just the ticket to get me going!

What? Well, uhm, yes. You're right, actually, and I'm really so flattered that you remember. My birthday is, indeed, in *cough* March. How kind of you to point that out.

But back to what I was saying. These post-its are perfect: motivating, yet realistic. I think they will be extremely helpful to me. And today's the day -- I'm opening the package!

OK! Here I go!


There! I did it! I'm taking action! I'm setting goals! Say hello to the new me!!

Oh, wait. Crap. That probably doesn't really count. Let me try again.

Ok, I know. Here's a good one!

Hmm. Does that actually count? I mean, can the One Thing I Do actually be something that I DON'T do? I'm going to have to think about that for a minute.

Upon further consideration, I have decided that I should only write things To Actually Do (as opposed to Not Do) on my To Do list blank. So I wrote a new goal. Here it is:


So now here's my question -- Does THIS post count??

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*Check out some other pretty bitter products they offer, like these Sentimental Journey cards, or these gift tags, or --Yikes!-- these Dirty Doilies.

For Everything Else, There's MasterCard.

6 doctor visit co-pays: $300
chest x-rays: $125
medications: $130
nebulizer rental: TBA

having everyone healthy again: priceless

Ugly Mug Coffee (A Fun Way to Start Your Day!)

How about a break from all that house business? It's time for another Product Review!

I was scanning the grocery store shelves for my usual brand of coffee, when something new caught my eye. The bag was attractive, the description was witty, and it was packaged with a handy metal clip on top! I was immediately hooked and bought my first bag of Ugly Mug coffee. (Excellent job, marketing department! I give you an A+.)

Forget about reading the back of your cereal box in the morning -- you need to read this bag of coffee!

Here's the front, with its inspired metal clip...

...here's one side...

...and the other side (gotta love the bedhead)...

...and the back, with a description that sealed the deal for me.

I came home and googled these guys, because my curiosity was piqued. There is a great website at uglymugcoffee.com, again very impressive for its marketing, but also because of the company's history and mission and genuine likability factor.

Plus there is even a place to send in your own personal bedhead photos! I mean, really -- do you have any idea how much I love a crazy detail like that?

For those of you who have not yet HAD your morning coffee, and therefore find it too overwhelming to go check the place out for yourselves or to follow this link to view more catchy ads, I will paste a couple examples here.

and

So how does the coffee TASTE? Well,...like coffee! But I'm afraid that it isn't the best coffee I've ever had. I WANT to love this stuff. I really really want to.

But if I'm totally honest, the "First Cup" blend I tried tastes a little dusty.

My solution was to make it extra strong, and then add so much cream and sugar that it was impossible NOT to love it. But I can't drink mugs of warm coffee-flavored ice cream every morning.

Is there anyone out there who can recommend a different blend of Ugly Mug for me to try? A bold, rich, buttery blend? One that tickles my coffee bone AND my tastebuds?

I would love to be able to fully endorse this stuff.

Seriously -- I even have my photo ready!

For the time being, I give Ugly Mug Coffee an overall rating of 3 Jujyfruits...though I truly hope I find a reason to raise that to a solid 5 some day!

Ugly Mug Coffee: 3 Jujyfruits

Product Review: Alphabet-Shaped Pretzels

I realized in looking back over my description of this blog, I mentioned that I love to find bargains and deals, but I have yet to feature any of these in my posts! So it's high time to include a few items in this category.

For my first product recommendation, I offer the perfect Back-To-School snack: Meijer Alphabet Shaped Pretzels. They taste like regular old pretzels, if perhaps not as thin and crunchy as the gold standard (Rold Gold Pretzel Sticks, IMHO). But pretzels? It's hard to go wrong with any brand, frankly, and the sheer fun that these alphabet shapes offer is well worth any difference in taste or crunch.

Of course, these pretzels are a wonderful snack for younger kids who are still learning the alphabet; Junior loves to discover one of his favorite letters while munching on a bowl of these. And I think they make an excellent choice for a classroom snack offering, if you happen to get requests from your kids' teachers (as I do), since they are fairly healthy, AND educational, AND cheap ($1.59 for a 15-oz. bag).

But the other thing these pretzels have going for them is the bonus entertainment factor they provide for older kids. Kids who are able to spell words and write phrases. Kids who like things snarky...

Kids like ME!

The possibilities are endless! Just think of all you could do with this little bag o' fun:

Do your kids ever complain about the snack you give them?

Do they ever tell you they're not hungry for the item on their plates?

Do they ever request something completely different than what you've already prepared?

Well, now parents have a fun and creative way to make a statement, let the kids know their options, or let off some steam, while at the same time providing a quick and easy after-school snack!

Or, of course, you could use them to help your children practice the alphabet or work on weekly spelling words...

...or to, ya know, leave messages like "Enjoy your snack," or "Hope you had a good day," or "I love you."

(Hunh! I guess these pretzels really would work for that, too, wouldn't they?!)

Please excuse me now...I need to quickly go change something before the kids get home!!

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Product Rating: 4.5 Jujyfruits

Dreams for Sale (3 for $4.25)

(Great photo borrowed from here.)
Yesterday I took the older kids to the county fair. Tantalized by the impressive prizes displayed so prominently at each of the gaming booths, my son asked if he could try to win something. I agreed, so we looked around to find The Game -- that is, the one that had good prizes, cost less than $5.00, and offered believable odds. We settled on the Ring Toss.

This ring toss offered a whole bucket of rings for $5, and the grand prize for ringing the center bottle was a brand new Wii! Each bucket had 60 rings -- that's right, folks, 60 chances to win a Wii! I knew the odds at ringing the center bottle were extremely poor, but I also decided we would try. I figured at the very least we could ring ONE bottle and walk home with the smallest prize.

The three of us lined up, grabbed a handful of rings, and starting tossing. Each of us dreamed of being the one to beat the odds and win the family a Wii!

The pile of rings got smaller and smaller...and not a single one had hit its mark. I'm not just talking about the magic center bottle -- I'm talking about ANY bottle.

Before we knew it, all the rings had been tossed. Even with a bucket full of chances, we didn't ring a single bottle. It was so anti-climactic. (Anti-climactic times three, actually!)

We kind of stood there, looking at each other.

Then the barker pointed out some rings on the ground that we had dropped! And just like that, the dream was restored, and we threw those final two stragglers at the bottle grid with a mighty fervor...

...and watched them ricochet down into the cracks.

So did we walk away? NOPE. We looked down at the ground again, hoping to spot just one more ring waiting to help us fulfill our destiny.

There weren't any more rings, but we saw three shiny quarters nestled in the grass!

And the crazy thing is, even though we didn't win that Wii -- or even a tiny pencil topper, for crying out loud!! -- we each still felt kind of lucky.

County Fair Receipt
Parking - Free
Drinks - $9.00
Ring Toss - $5.00
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Believing in Our Dreams - Priceless

Fanny Pack News Flash!

I spoke to my daughter on the phone Saturday as she was heading home from camp. As we were talking, she suddenly said, "Hey, Grammy -- did you get my fanny pack from the cabin?" off to the side.

I strained my ears to hear the response from the background on that end...and, of course, it was a mildly surprised negative. That's right -- The Infamous Fanny Pack, highly sought after and debated, the main purpose of which was to keep her things close by and handy -- was itself forgotten!

"Well," I thought to myself, "I guess it really wasn't all that superior to more traditional toting methods after all. Everything was misplaced anyway...and they really do look pretty silly. No wonder they are all but extinct!"

I brought in the mail this morning and saw the cover of the July 2008 American Girl catalog. Un. Be. LIEVable. You can buy matching fanny packs belt bags for girls and their dolls?! "Does this mean they are nostalgic time-period accessories, or generally something the young kids these days are yearning for, like Webkinz, or a Wii??," I wondered.

Well! Imagine my surprise when the following magazine pages caught my eye while in the waiting room of the hospital for Junior's weekly Speech Therapy and Occupational Therapy sessions later...

(click to super-size images)

LOOK AT THIS! They may be Stars, but they really are just like us...and some of them even wear fanny packs belt bags!! Ok, so maybe that makes them NOT like us, but I think they might be on to something and we should bring back the pack, too!

Of course, these are candid shots, taken while they are just slumming around. So these photos could just be the equivalent of Stars With Cellulite or Stars Without Makeup or Stars Caught Red-Handed!
But then I kept reading and came to the StyleWatch page. NO WAY!! Stars are wearing them on the red carpet! Stylists are adding them as accessories! Coach sells them for $128.00!!
And LOOK! It's not just Hollywood that's doing it. Fanny packs Belt bags are being worn on the PGA Tour! (Will Tiger Woods start promoting them in commercials??)

And, speaking of commercials, what do you see on the waist of this carefree model? That's right. Another one! Think about it -- you can have ZERO periods (all year long!), and no more bulky, cumbersome purses to carry, either!! (That right there is some SERIOUS freedom, ladies.)

So there you have it, people. It's official. Feel free to strap on those packs and move about with pride!

Turns out you are NOT the only one.

That's Quite a Belt You've Got There, Mister

Before my daughter left for camp, I mentioned wanting to buy her a fanny pack to take along. Well, let me tell you, that got some laughs. As well as a recommendation to go "look in the 80s".

But I maintained that it would be really fabulous because a)she could carry her camera, sunglasses, chapstick, etc. on hikes, b)keep her hands free, and c)not lose anything! Fanny packs may not be the most fashionable accessory, but I'm sort of admiring the genius of them again. (Shhh! Don't tell anyone.)

I found one, brand spanking new on a store shelf, believe it or not! And if you should decide to purchase such a handy little pouch, here are a few things you should know.

First of all, "Fanny Pack" is no longer in use (the WORD I mean -- quit laughing!). "Belt Bag" is the current politically correct term.

And secondly, less important, but perhaps even more shocking -- You can now buy them with a belt that expands UP TO 60 INCHES! I kid you not.

I guess they figure that if your waist measurement is bigger than that, you're probably not going to be hiking anywhere.

I couldn't picture exactly how big 60 inches is, though, so I googled "60 inch diameter". Let me show you what it looks like. (links provide photo credits)

This table.

The platform on this tower.

Possibly one of these hay bales.

And here's an interesting fact: there aren't even many Santa suits that will fit a 60-inch waist, but I did find this place that carries an XXXL that would just fit.

Remember several weeks ago when Japan issued new rules for waistline measurements of 33.5 inches for men and 35.4 inches for women? I don't think we'll be exporting too many of these expandable fanny packs belt bags over there!

But as far as wearing them here, on our average-sized selves, well...if you should decide to buy one, I promise not to laugh!

21st Century Lemonade Stand

Have I got a deal for you, dear readers!

A little neighborhood friend of mine is running an ebay auction this week, and the clump of dirt that he is offering is definitely a One-Of-A-Kind, Must-See item!

No seriously, it really is a clump of dirt , but you need to go read about it to appreciate the whole story.

As a mother of a child who once sold pillbugs (one per Dixie Cup, only 25 cents each!), drawings (each priced according to her level of pride), dandelion curls!! (remember stripping the ends then dipping them in water?), and most recently, candy (to raise her bunny money), I have to say I am fully supportive of Hewitt's entrepreneurial ebay endeavor.

I have already asked a question and placed 2 bids....wouldn't it be fun to help him get a few more?? (hint, hint!)

I'll even stick a link in my sidebar temporarily, so it's easy to go bid and follow along with the action. See ya on ebay!

Gender Differences

I took Tootsie (my 11-year-old daughter) and Bubbs (my 9-year-old son) shopping for spring clothes. Tootsie was excited to go, as she generally enjoys picking things out and trying them on. Bubbs, on the other hand, does not enjoy it. He would rather wear last year's too-tight shorts than waste all that time looking and then be forced to endure the torture of the dressing room, to top it all off! He doesn't particularly care what he wears, but he's reached a size where I can no longer simply pull something off the rack and assume it'll fit. He really needs to try things on first. So after some haggling, we set off for the store, a minivan filled with mixed emotions.

Now, we are a family who tries not to have many gender-based stereotypes. I don't automatically assume that all girls love pink or that all boys love sports, or other similar blanket statements. But I have learned that for our family, at least, there are undeniable gender differences when it comes to shopping. Here's the evidence.

Tootsie was very excited about this pair of Old Navy shorts which she picked out herself (one of the very few pink things she owns, by the way):

Bubbs was very excited about this contraption he made out of found and discarded parts scoured from the Old Navy floor:

For the record, he got new shorts, too. But the size he actually tried on was too big, so I just bought the next size down straight off the rack. He was too busy having fun shopping.